E/D: Fun P/R:Lark
Looking at the pitiful creature screaming in pain, Shaar laughed so hard, he started rolling on the floor while holding his belly.
This malicious laughter stimulated more tears from the pitiful creature’s eyes, and he threw away the bread out of spite. While pressing his lost front tooth to his chest, he started crying, overwhelmed by grief.
Finally calming down from his laughter, Shaar stood and picked the bread up with his charred pitch fork. He extended it towards the fire coming from the high-piled firewood and started roasting it while putting on a smile: “It’s certain now, you have never stayed in the wilderness in the past. Before eating these things, you must roast them first, to make them softer.”
Seeing this fellow still weeping bitterly, Shaar scratched his head:
“Come on, stop crying. Isn’t it just a tooth? Real men do not cry when losing a tooth.” He continued with good intentions, trying to comfort him: “You should be a noble right? You must be rich! Just wait until you get home, then go find a good craftsman and insert a gold tooth. In our town, the tavern’s boss has inserted two gold teeth, each time he smiles, his mouth shines like a gold bar, I don’t have to tell you how impressive that looks!”
Just when he was about to calm down, he heard Shaar’s speech about inserting a gold tooth and “mouth shining like a gold bar”. The pitiful creature became terribly saddened again and almost cried himself to death on the spot.
Not caring anymore, Shaar started selfishly eating roasted bread with his big mouth. Thinking for a while, he decided to keep a small piece for this pitiful fellow.
“Hey, I would like to remind you that if you don’t eat now, the next time you eat will be tomorrow afternoon.”
Done with talking, Shaar got up, started unpacking a piece of cloth for a while and finally pulled out a dry and hard coal like briquette. From far away, the pitiful creature could still smell the stench and could not bear it anymore, so he covered his nose.
Shaar walked around the periphery of the camp, cautiously grinding the powder from the briquette and sprinkling it in the surroundings. After finishing this process, he clapped his hands and rubbed it on his clothes while not bothering to wash it, then he walked towards the high-piled firewood and extinguished it with a kick while pushing the ashes aside.
Still boiling hot from the fire, Shaar lied down, satisfied.
Getting ready to sleep, he turned around and mumbled: “good night,” with his ass facing the pitiful creature, in less than a minute a loud snoring sound could be heard.
“This jerk, he, h-he did not care how I felt and went to bed by himself?!”
Resentment filled the heart of the pitiful creature, half from the sorrow of losing his tooth, the other half from being ignored by this rude guy.
“This bastard, could he be a blind person?!”
Listening to Shaar’s loud snoring sound, the pitiful creature finally stopped his internal moaning. Not being able to bear the hunger anymore, he finally took that small piece of bread Shaar left behind and put it in his lips, nibbling on it.
The tooth was still somewhat sore and the black bread’s rough texture was difficult to swallow. Nevertheless, he was too hungry and that nasty thing was the only food available. After forcing several bites of bread into his mouth, the pitiful creature eventually started choking on it while his eyes started turning red again. While he was panicking and almost crying, he suddenly saw that the fellow was awake and looking at him. He did not know when Shaar woke up, but his eyes were wide open and he was looking at him with a mocking smile.
Shocked from being seen in this embarrassing manner, the pitiful creature was startled and spat and the bread all over his clothes while nearly coughing himself to death.
“You must be someone who is used to a good life.” Shaar used his bag as a pillow, tilted his legs and smiled: “Hey, where did you come from?”
The pitiful creatures stared at this fellow with a ferocious look.
“Hm, your hair is blonde, so you should be a Byzantine. However you are quite tall, most Byzantines do not have such height and only the northern Odins are this tall. Furthermore, the accent that you spoke with was also very strange. It was the official Byzantium language, but your pronunciation is very awkward and somewhat stiff, also not how the Odins normally speak – I met some people from the Odin Empire in Primal Wildfire Town, and when those fellows spoke in Byzantium language, it sounded really weird since their tongues were not used to the bending. Hehe, so….Who are you? How could a person like you come to a dangerous place like this and step in a hunter’s animal trap?”
The pitiful creatures did not answer and gave Shaar a disgusted look.
Shaar declared: “Up to you if you don’t want to talk. I guess you must be a wanted criminal. Hehe, probably committed some crime and are on the run now, that’s why you do not dare say your name? Relax, I am not a bounty hunter and won’t turn you in for bounty.”
“Then what are you?” The pitiful creature finally opened his mouth.
“I…. I am a magical beast hunter!” Finishing his declaration, Shaar proudly threw out his chest.
The pitiful creature looked at him with scorn: “You are hunting magical beasts? With your broken axe and charred pitch fork? Ha, I have seen magical beast hunters before and they are always well-equipped. Just a piece of their equipment is worth at least 100 times more than your family belongings combined. Where are your anti-magic protective gears? Do you have weapons to break the magic beast’s defence? I think you are only a little third-rate hunter at best.”
These words poked at Shaar’s sore spot. He rolled his eyes and snorted: “Heng, the old man was right, an ugly person is always rude!”
The pitiful creature’s eyes instantaneously widened and stared at Shaar with an indescribable look. Recovering from his shock, he suddenly jumped up!
Not caring about the wound on his legs, the pain in his head and not even that a small piece of tooth chipped off! He roared at Shaar:
“What did you just say?! You said that I am ugly?!!!”
The pitiful creatures flew into a rage, while hearing the most intolerable insult.
“Are you not?” Shaar looked disdained at this guy: “As a “man”, your appearance is simply pitiful, if you could even be called that. Look at yourself, you grew this tall, but you can’t even open an animal trap by yourself.
Next, your face – a handsome man should have a robust physique, strong and muscular. Your face should be square, featured with thick eyebrows and a wide mouth. Ideally, you would have a scar on your face, a big mouth to drink liquor and eat meat in bulk….That is a real man.”
Oh my gods, forgive this pitiful hillbilly….
It was obvious that this boy had little experience in the real world. His aesthetic standard was so twisted, and to a large extent… it could be said that it was entirely “attributed” to that already dead old fart!
In order to make his own adopted son respect him, that old man taught him that his image and behaviours were the standards of the worlds most handsome and amazing men.
Vulgarity, sturdiness, scars, ability to eat a lot, drink a lot and sleep….
Although Shaar mingled in Primal Wildfire Town in some bad places and was gradually influenced by the basic attitude from the town locals, it had to be said that in certain aspects he was still very innocent.
Hearing his explanation, the pitiful creature’s jaw dropped. This time it wasn’t from anger, but from this guy’s ridiculous world view.
“As for you, as a man you are really useless. But if you were a woman….” Shaar blinked his eye.
“….as a female then?” The pitiful creature could not help but ask.
“If you were a woman, then you would be even uglier.” Shaar’s words almost made the pitiful creature spit blood.
“Ugly! You said I am ugly!!”The pitiful creature was enraged!
Her head may break and her blood may flow. As a beautiful woman, who would be surprised that her own appearance was the most important thing to her. This was the one thing all beautiful women in the world would not tolerate when insulted!
“You hillbilly, tell me, how does a beautiful woman look like?!”
“First she needs to have a big ass and big breasts.” Shaar lifted both his hands to make two extremely exaggerated arcs: “A big assed woman can have many children and a woman needs large breasts to produce sufficient breast milk to feed the children. Additionally, her hands and feet need to be thick so that she can work, cook and carry water to wash clothes, hehe.”
The pitiful creature stopped being angry and started to give Shaar a strange look: “Hey, then what about the…face? In your opinion, how should a beautiful woman’s face look like?”
“Face? Does it matter how the face looks like?” Shaar said in a disapproving tone: “The old man said: Turn off the lights and all women look the same.”
He deliberately put a very sophisticated look on his face.
….The pitiful creature started to pity this pitiful hillbilly.
“Uh, who is the ‘old man’ you talked about?”
“My foster father.”
The pitiful creature sighed and looked at Shaar while asking in a low voice: “These things you said were taught by your foster father?”
“Ok, I understand now….” The pitiful creature answered in a relaxed tone: “Your foster father certainly had a grudge against you.”
Failing to agree with each other, they simply turned around and decided to sleep. At midnight, feeling the cold wind against her body, the pitiful creature woke up still feeling drowsy. The heat from the fire had already cooled down and her body was rolled together. Unable to resist the cold air, while still half asleep, her instinct drew her towards the only heat source in the vicinity.
Still in his sleep, Shaar felt that something soft had sneaked into his embrace. Not caring, he bluntly turned and pressed his thigh on the other side’s waist. Drowsily, he probably thought that he was holding a big soft cotton blanket and even wickedly rubbed against it a couple of times.
When the sun started rising, the pitiful creature woke up first. She did not sleep very well the whole night and after waking up, she immediately discovered something horrible.
When this hillbilly did start hugging her with his arms?!
Her instincts told her to scream, but she immediately discovered that the hillbilly was still sleeping at the same place as last night. It was her who moved, actually quite far away from before – vaguely, she started remembering that it was of her own initiative, seeking warmth in his embrace!!
Her heart started pounding madly. The body of this hillbilly had an unpleasant fishy smell, yet the warmth from his embrace felt sinfully comfortable and made his pitiful cold-fearing creature hesitant to leave this sanctuary.
Just when she moved her body a bit, she immediately discovered an even more terrible thing!
Okay…. Let us carefully analyze this situation….
First, Schaar’s thigh was pressed tightly against the body of this pitiful creature.
Alright, although this was somewhat excessive, it was nothing compared to the following event.
Secondly, Shaar was a healthy young man and according to his “ideal woman” standard, it was obvious that he was a virgin. Therefore in the morning, his body had an urge that all men around the world knew about.
A minute ago when the pitiful creature moved her body, she immediately felt the thigh pressing against her body, and an extremely hard rod-like thing pushing against her waist.
Even whilst wearing several layers of clothes, she could feel herself being threatened by this ferocious weapon.
Even though the pitiful creature was young, nonetheless…. Compared to the hillbilly who did not understand common knowledge, she knew the important facts about men and women.
She only needed a moment to instantaneously understand what kind of weapon was thrusting against her waist!
The almighty gods could testify! In the 17 years of this pitiful creature’s life, she has never been violated this excessively by a man!
So she immediately responded according to her instincts.
Bent body, bent knees…preparing to strike….
“Kyaaaa!!!” A loud shriek.
“Aaaaaahh!!!” A pitiful cry.
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